Saudade







Pernah kuragukan semesta, masihkah ia menyimpan untukku satu musim semi.
Waktu bergerak jauh tak lagi dapat kutangkap rupa,
Jiwaku melepuh, dalam himpitan menahun kering kerontang jalan yang kutempuh

Pernah kutanyakan putik bunga Selanga di tepi jalan,
bila kutunggu ia mekar,
bolehkah kupetik untuk hiasan telinga seorang biduan,
penari dalam setiap upacara kebangkitan, 
rasa hormat yang lama menghilang.

Pernah kusurati Istana Golestan,
Bila kukirimkan bala tantara Burung Kenari dari tanah Fansur,
Sudikah Rabab mengiringi lantunan melodi juta pujian,
Mewakili tarikan suara merdu rinduku menghujam tak lagi punya detik melentur.

Pernah kupaksa juga belantara,
Agar setiap belaian semilir menyentuh lembut lambaian dedaunan beribu laksa,
Menyisipkan nyanyian perekat kalbu kita,
Ikatlah, dengan lekat, nafas-nafas kami dalam gelombang lautan rasa serupa.

Setelah cerita ini padamu kubisikan,
Masihkah sempat kau berhitung, kasih?
Jumlah munajat jagad raya yang menghimpun nama kita,
Dalam majlis-majlis syair pujangga,
dan tumpah ruah geunaseh.

Idi Rayeuk.
4 Januari 2023
Yah Deelat


For over five months, he pursued me, convincing me of his love. It was our second encounter that made him certain I was the spring he had been waiting for, after countless moons had failed to appear. On that day, he sent me this poem, simultaneously persuading me to be his soul. However, I still resisted, until two months later, I agreed that he had indeed become a part of me.

So, this is the poem he wrote for me at the beginning of 2023. He said he penned it out of sadness when I told him that "we couldn't be together yet. I wasn't ready for it."

But now, here we are as a lovely couple ever.

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